the boy with the most cake
.................................................
boy kampai : utak alkohol
7.12.2004

toink's little instructional booklet

Find your inner pig

Never forget to stop and smoke the roses

You're 23 years old. It's time to make mistakes

I am a victim of my own design. Everything is my fault

Never stop thinking. Dreaming. And believing that there's no such thing as multiple orgasm in 5 minutes.

I will always have a second chance to fuck it up again.

Never take yourself serwoosly.

Conformity is cheap. Haggle.

Be unique. Like everyone else.

Though there are, always assume that no one loves you. So start loving yourself. Then stroke it like a samamabitch.

Be silly. Be kooky. Be drunk. Monkeys!!!!!!

Listen to no one else's inner voices but yourself's

Promise yourself to learn a new language. So it's easier to acces foreign pornsites.

Always believe in something even if that something is nothing to da batrum en da kitsen en da knee. New knee, Knew nee, nuni nu ninu ninu

The measure of a man is, this is kinky, i cant continue.

Dogs, she-males and poor people are human too. Learn tolerance.

There's a billion others better than you. Learn denial. Or sarcasm.

God created gay. God also created homophobia as damage control. (heheheheheheh)

I am my dad's sperm. Always thank him.

Always count to nine when pain is felt. (I'm not sure if this is true, but it is said that all kinds of pain in the world only lasts a good 9 seconds. And that any pain felt afterwards is pure self indulgence.)

My milskshake, I repeat, My milkshake. Is so much better than yours.

If it does not fit in your mouth, dont eat it. But if you wanna force it in, make sure it tastes good.

Your evil is strong. Learn to control it.

Being unstraight is not a curse. Being an ugly, boring, self-righteous and good for nothing unstraight is.

My time is now. But the "now" has already passed. SO my time is "a while ago". Tomorrow, my time will be "yesterday".

If it feels good, if it's just right, it's the devil.

Don't believe in God yet. Believe in innate goodness.

All tv shows will eventually be reruns. My life wont. Let's get crazy.

Love can wait. So can sterility, conformity, boredom, drugs, success, threesomes, faith, tubal ligation, and bungee jumping

I am a God of something.

There is always someone there to remind me. (Tada dat da da)

Make friends with people who know what they're doing.

When all else fails, uhm, you're screwed. Tough luck!

More beer, more honesty. More honesty, more fuck ups. More fuck ups, more beer! It's a vicious, vicious cycle.

Flirting is subjective.

Believe, do what you have to. It's your fucking life.

Die a happy motherfucker. No regrets.

7.02.2004

so where was i

in front of our village is another village. at the gate of said village is a small garden. in that small garden, instead of a "keep off the fucking grass" sign, was a sign that reads "Utos ng Diyos: Bawal Magasawahan Ang Parehong Kasarian" and im like... "where in the fucking bible would you find that?"

but then again, why do i give a shit?! im never gonna marry. hehehehehehehehe

**

at the mall, looking for chino's late gift, i heard the radio jock. and he commented "konsensya ang nasasaktan, pag lahat ng parte ng katawan ang nasasarapan." and the first thing i thought about was *ehem* kirsh. hihihihihihi. whatever happened to that guy?

**

i just got home from the office and my mom was watching tv. in one of the commercials, she commented, "puling oh. kamukha mo si jericho rosales" to which i replied with a Mister Pogi cliche just for the heck of it, "hindi ko siya kamukha mami, kamukha nya lang ako" to which she laughed like she never heard that joke before. i left the room and my brother was smiling like an idiot. he mustve overheard it.

**

there's this distant relative from my mom's side Efren. he "kinda" fondled me when i was a lil kid. he left and a few years later, his brother, Edward visited. who looks like him. i remember feeling queasy. nothing of that sort happened again. he left and more years later another brother came. a younger, hotter, stocky, mestizo version of the "E" brothers came. he was called Kano for obvious reasons. i had the hots for him. and would sometimes chill at the veranda so i could peek at him in his shorts or a towel.

im telling this story because Edward visited us again. he looked so old. balding, white beard, dark skin, tatoos on his chest. kinda reminded me of moses. i loved and hated those brothers.

**

yun lang. move on to other blogs. :D

















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